Self Reflection

Tonight I had a breakthrough.  Instead of indulging in some of my necessary daily routines I took a different route.......I allowed myself to think clearly.  For the first time in a while my mental state was naked, and when I say naked I mean free of issue, something it hadn't been in a long time. Like any other person I'm riddled with insecurities, and although my exterior comes off confident and secure I've struggled with self doubt.  The best thing you can do is take on the task at hand and remain focused on what's most important in your life at that given time.  I've had issues that have consumed my daily existence for a while that I hadn't thoroughly addressed and by refusing to address those things, I made myself somewhat stagnant. Honestly I'm so good at masking my own issues that I make myself believe that every things ok even when its not.  However, in actuality I'm not content with where I am or what's going on around me and I'm fully aware in order to make change, I have to change within.  By resorting back to things that comfort me I've hindered my own progress.  When I left for college I promised myself that I'd never come back to the place I grew up and I haven't yet fulfilled that promise.  I also promised myself that I would be different, and by being different I mean just allowing belief in my own abilities to takeover instead of overthinking situations.  I know I"m not alone when I say I tend to overthink some of the smallest of issues, and by doing that I generally get in my own way.  In essence like most people, I am my own worst enemy and by being afraid to take risks I've slowed down my metamorphosis.  The biggest mistake I've made was losing myself and consuming myself with my daily ups and downs.  As I let pressure consume me I lost the urgency to fulfill what's most important to me.  Today is the day life changes, the only person that controls that is the man in the mirror and hopefully this realization helps someone else as it did me.